Should you reveal your baby’s name before birth?
My husband and I are private people. We were quite unsure about wanting to reveal the sex and had to think a lot about it before making a decision. However, revealing the name before birth was not an option for us. Here is why:
1. Your baby’s name is the only thing you can truly keep to yourself during a pregnancy.
Having a baby involves many medical encounters, preparation classes, and announcements. Becoming expectant parents puts you in the light for nine months and mothers-to-be are scrutinized by everyone all the time. “You’ve gained too much weight, you can’t eat raw food, do this, don’t do that”. This over exposure is not very pleasant. Not revealing the name of our daughter until she was born was a way to have our little secret, but also to build up some suspense and surprise everyone on D-Day.
2. No bad luck allowed.
Like many people, I am a little superstitious. I don’t walk under ladders and I try hard not to break mirrors. Revealing the name of our daughter before birth felt like it would bring us bad luck. Although my pregnancy went smoothly, getting bad news from a doctor is what we all fear the most. I did everything I could to have a healthy baby and I wasn’t going to let any curse, voodoo, or negative vibes in.
3. Follow local traditions.
I had my first daughter while being stationed in Belgium. There, all new parents follow the same ritual and it is unusual to reveal the baby’s name before birth. Belgians are very attached to their birth announcement cards. All loved ones receive one in the mail with all the interesting baby analytics and the name! We felt it was normal to follow the local custom and had cards printed. It was pretty stressful as you have to tell the printing company quickly after the birth and make sure they spell everything right … It made for a beautiful name announcement that people could keep as a lifelong souvenir.
4. Give yourself the right to change your mind.
Name picking has become tedious over the past few years. We parents try to find the perfect name. It needs to be unique, a little original and meaningful. Out of all the things we had to pick/decide to welcome a new baby, the name kept us wondering until the end. I had a girl’s name in mind since I was a teenager. That name was Georgina and that’s the only one I considered for our first daughter. My husband didn’t love it at first and leaned more towards Olivia. I agreed that my name pick was a little too original and I slowly let it go, until my husband decided otherwise a few days before giving birth. You have the right to be undecided, so keeping the name to yourself gives you the option to change your mind without justification.
5. If you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all.
We all fear negativity and judgment. Your loved ones are humans and will have an opinion about your child’s name. I didn’t love my niece’s name because it reminded me of a silly soap opera character from the 90s. I had the decency not to tell the parents and this unflattering connotation quickly faded away with the baby’s arrival. No all your loved ones will be able to keep their opinion to themselves. Keeping the name to yourself until the birth saves you second-guessing thoughts and unenthusiastic comments overall.
Having a child is a gift, so don’t unwrap it all before it’s time! More importantly, do what you feel is right for your family and yourself. The right decision will be the one coming from your heart, your gut, your soul…
Thank you for reading.
Here are the most popular baby names in 2023 to help you make your choice!
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